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Lessons from Nana

By on Jan 11, 2014 in Posts | 3 comments

My win today is my 97 year old Nana! Not only am I thrilled to have her genes, but also, I am blessed to have learned some valuable life lessons from her. Over the past few days, I’ve taken some time to reflect on the impact she’s had on me. Today, her final day on earth, I want to share just a few of the many lessons we can learn by following her example. Lesson 1: Stay active.   What person in her 80s is hit by a car while crossing the street (yes, car on body not car on car) and bounces back after quickly recovering from a broken hip; only Nana! She attributes her stellar health to the fact that she walks everywhere. She is legally blind, and has been since a young age, so never got a driver’s license. Rather than dwell on her poor eyesight or use it as an excuse, Nana simply took the opportunity to enjoy some fresh air and exercise. In cold New England winters, walking anywhere is a feat. I imagine that having to walk regularly to do errands and get to work would become quite a chore. Although she was retired before I was born, I cannot recall ever hearing her complain about it. However, I can remember countless times that she expressed gratitude for her walks and appreciation that they’d contributed to her long and healthy life. Lesson 2: Enjoy Simple Pleasures For someone with poor eyesight, Nana sure appreciates beauty. She absolutely delights in everyday beauty, particularly flowers. Every time she received a bouquet or we’d walk past a garden, she’d comment “oh what beautiful colors they are!” She has this same appreciation for food. Many times, she’d tell me in detail about a delicious meal she’d recently had. I can even remember her describing with pleasure a meal she had on an airplane! She is not shy about eating, and although her waistline doesn’t show it, she can eat more than most. My husband was embarrassed when she out-ate him at breakfast the first time they met. Food and flowers are just two of the many things most of us take for granted but that Nana consistently appreciates and enjoys. Lesson 3: Be Friendly It is definitely from Nana that I inherited my willingness to talk to complete strangers. Perhaps it was her southern upbringing, or perhaps just her personality, but Nana has a way of befriending anyone she meets. The first time I visited her assisted living facility, Nana introduced me to everyone by name and then told me something nice about them. Since she always sees the best in people, Nana turns strangers into friends quickly and maintains those friendships long-term. Lesson 4: Go for a Ride                 Nana loves going to new places, seeing new things and simply going for rides. She doesn’t care where she is going, this social butterfly just loves going out. She is up for anything and ready to go at a moment’s notice. Whether we’re going to my house, out to eat, or anywhere in between, she was excited. Nana often bragged that she signed up for every single outing that was offered from her assisted living facility and told me that getting out and being social kept her young. Lesson 4: Dance & Play                 Nana loves to dance. For many years she took line dancing classes and learned many dances, including the Macarena, which she taught me! My middle-school mind assumed it was an “old lady” dance until I saw people doing it at a party a few weeks later! Nana  also loves games, particularly bingo and skip-bo. We’ve played together many times and perhaps it is from her, my love of games developed. Like her, I am a bit competitive and very social; games satisfy both. Maybe this is why she likes them, or maybe it’s because she’s quite lucky. Last time we played bingo together she won twice and everyone we were playing with was envious! Lesson 5: Stay Positive                 This is the last, but certainly not least, lesson I learned through Nana’s example. She is one of the most pleasant and positive people I have ever met. As mentioned above, she turned negatives, such as poor eyesight, into positives, such as exercise.  Additionally, I cannot recall a single instance in which she gossiped or complained about others. Instead, she talked about all of the good things that had happened recently. The places she’d been, people she’d seen and delicious meals she ate. Throughout her 97 years, I am certain that Nana has had some very difficult times, but those are not what she chooses to dwell on or talk about. Instead, she shared with me her happy memories and positive experiences. Because of this, her legacy will be of smiles, positivity, happiness, fun and adventure. I can only hope that years from now, my own granddaughter will have as many positive memories of...

Successful New Year’s Resolutions

By on Dec 29, 2013 in Posts | 0 comments

With 2014 only a few days away, many of us are reflecting on the past year and looking for ways to improve ourselves and our lives in the new year. New Years is a time when many of us set goals, but few of us actually keep them. According to Statistic Brain, 49% of us infrequently have success in achieving our New Year’s resolutions, while 24% of us never do. Don’t let these stats discourage you. This article also claims that “People who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t.” I recently spoke to two friends who successfully kept their 2013 resolutions: Lindsay lost 50 lbs. and Michelle flossed her teeth twice a day. Since then, I have been reflecting on the commonalities between these women their goals. I’m trying to discover the secret to their success, or at least a few tips that can increase my chances of achieving my resolutions for 2014. First, we must set ourselves up for success by picking the right resolution. I found a Huffington Post article that lists three characteristics required for a successful New Year’s resolution. It must be: realistic, measurable and challenging (because let’s face it, if it were easy we’d already be doing it). Both Lindsay’s and Michelle’s resolutions met the criteria. Still, I felt it took much more than this to succeed. Lindsay, who had dieted, lost, and quickly regained weight in the past, told me she had known how to successfully lose weight all along, but for some reason was finally “ready” to make the commitment to regular exercise and a healthier diet, this year. Lindsay was able to lose the weight in a healthy (and more permanent) way because she was “ready.” I have heard former smokers say the same thing. They had tried to quit and failed several times; but once they were “ready,” they quit cold turkey and never looked back. This made me realize that the Huffington Post neglected to mention a fourth, equally vital, resolution characteristic: important. A successful New Year’s resolution needs to be something that we believe to be important enough to be “ready” to commit to. We cannot simply make up resolutions on a whim because it’s a holiday tradition. In order to succeed, we need to find the resolution important enough to influence our behavior, even when it is difficult. It needs to be important enough that we’ll put down the chocolate, lace up our sneakers, pick up the dental floss, etc. On a side note, Michelle is a teeth person. Good teeth is on the top of her must have list for a guy she would date, and she claims that she can smell other people’s cavities – so although flossing twice a day may not pass the importance litmus test for many of us, it did for her. My final thought on resolution selection is to choose wisely. Although we all have a laundry list of things we’d like to improve, most of us cannot successfully complete 15 resolutions simultaneously – so we need to prioritize! It’s not the quantity, it’s the quality. In order to set ourselves up for success, we need to pick one or two goals that are, realistic, measurable, challenging, and important; and then commit to make them happen! Okay so now that we k now how to select a resolution or two, how do we follow through? I am certainly not an expert, but these were a few suggestions t Break it into Mini-Goals: If we have a goal that cannot be achieved overnight, like losing 50 lbs., we should follow Lindsay’s example and break it into smaller realistic and measurable mini-goals. Lindsay began by walking a few miles each day, not worrying about how slowly or quickly she went. This daily “little win”  of walking motivated her to eat well – since she didn’t want to counteract her progress by eating junk food. Achieving these little wins is a good way to see progress and increase the likelihood that the longer-term goal is attainable. Check Progress Regularly: We must do something to ensure that the resolution stays top of mind – rather than simply being forgotten sometime between New Year’s and mid-February. I am not suggesting obsessively getting on the scale five times per day. What I do think would help is to set a weekly alarm, and spend a few minutes reflecting on how we’ve done over the past 7 days (if your goal is weight related now is your time to hop on a scale). A few other ideas are: to journal about progress or mark an “X” on a calendar for each day we’ve successfully flossed twice, gone without a cigarette, exercised etc. Make the Resolution Known: If you are serious about completing a resolution, you’re going to need a support team. Letting your friends and family know about this goal will give them the opportunity to motivate you or at least avoid de-railing your progress. Others can also help hold you accountable – if you ask them to. They can check in with you on your progress and encourage you along the way. Don’t Become De-Railed by Setbacks: No one is perfect, so we cannot expect ourselves to be. Lindsay mentioned that she didn’t beat herself up if she failed to exercise one day or ate a dessert. She knew that if she was going to make a...

Christmas Cards

By on Dec 17, 2013 in Posts | 0 comments

With Christmas rapidly approaching, there never seems to be enough time to get everything done, and if you’re like me, everything takes 2 -3  times longer than anticipated. I thought I had it all figured out this year by doing the vast majority of my shopping online. As an Amazon Prime member, I get free shipping, and thus, at no additional cost, I avoided circling the mall parking lot, aimlessly wandering to find the perfect gift, debating about which gift is the perfect one, and then waiting in a long line to purchase it. Online shopping definitely saved me time, and likely a quite bit of frustration, but somehow the hustle and bustle remained. One thing that I was determined not to let slip through the cracks despite my tight schedule was Christmas cards. I’ve meant to do them for the past two years, but never got around to it.  Two years ago, I planned to use a wedding photo, and last year a photo from my honeymoon in Thailand (which being 6 months later was in 2012). This year, I finally made it happen. It was not easy, and the cards may actually not arrive until after Christmas, but today, simply getting them sent is a win. The first struggle during my Christmas card fiasco was taking the photo. My husband set a tripod facing our Christmas tree while I tried to get the dog to pose. She could tell we were up to something, and she didn’t like it. Suddenly, this normally cuddle-happy dog would not stay seated on my lap. In that moment, I was untrustable and she wanted down! It was hilarious, my husband pressing the camera’s timer button and rushing to sit down, while I tried to look natural holding a squirming puppy. I decided to wrap her in a blanket, hoping that may comfort her and calm her down. After three or four takes, and the dog becoming increasingly restless, we decided to use the best of the bunch – with the hope that fellow dog owners may get a kick out of the imperfection. The next struggle was ordering the photos on Shutterfly, after manually adding all of the addresses,  I attempted to order 50 cards – one to each person. Somehow the website was registering my order as 50 cards per person at a cost of over $1,000. I could not figure out how to fix it, so the next morning, I called Shutterfly’s customer service line.  Evidently I was not the only last minute card sender having technical difficulties; the estimated wait time was 57 minutes! Luckily, they had the option of leaving a call back number and have a customer service representative call back. I took advantage of this option and the pleasant woman fixed my order. Victory was mine – cards were ordered and en-route! I love receiving cards and sending them felt good. My hope was that receiving my silly card, may brighten a few people’s day during this fun and chaos filled season! Christmas cards always remind me of the most important part of the holiday season, connecting with the friends and family that you love. They are a great way to say show loved ones that you’re thinking of them. Next year, my goal is to review my address list in advance and collect any missing ones.  A few people who would have otherwise  received a card, did not, simply because I didn’t know their address off hand and didn’t have time to wait for their response if I requested updated addresses. If you’re in that group, sorry! With any luck you’ll get one next year! In the meantime, Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good...

Portfolio Career

By on Nov 28, 2013 in Posts | 0 comments

My win today is being introduced to the term “portfolio career.” This term describes making a career of doing various part-time, consulting or freelance jobs simultaneously OR of having a full-time job along with other side job(s). It is the antithesis of the traditional linear “career path” that I envisioned having post-graduation.  This term legitimizes having a multifaceted career and shows that it may be a conscious choice, rather than simply a result of not finding one’s “true passion.” It proves that this lifestyle is not necessarily a temporary hurdle to overcome due to circumstances such as job loss or the inability to get a high paying job in one’s field. Instead it can be a fulfilling and lucrative career path. As someone who did theater, played rugby, was in a sorority, volunteered, interned, and worked throughout college, I obviously crave variety! (And perhaps am a bit crazy). The thought of doing the same thing day in and day out has never appealed to me. Until hearing this term and doing some research on it, I had always thought that my desire to not settle down and climb the corporate ladder was immature, unrealistic, and made me indecisive. I have continuously been searching for the right career: one that could make me happy and financially stable in the long term. Although I have enjoyed several of the jobs that I’ve had thus far, including my current job, I cannot imagine doing any one job five days per week for the next 40+ years. I had previously thought my only alternative would be to change careers every once in a while. I had heard a statistic that most twenty and thirty-somethings will have seven different careers throughout our lives, and thought that I’d likely be one of them. However, having to start at the bottom and work my way up in a new industry every five to ten years did not seem ideal either. The thought of exploring several mini-careers simultaneously, however, is very intriguing. My research on portfolio careers has helped me realize that I am not alone in struggling to commit to one career, and that I no longer need to force myself into the box of choosing a traditional path and advancing in the field that I select.  Instead, I can either advance in one career while having others on the side, or simply have several “side jobs” that are each pieces of my career puzzle. According to an article in Forbes, portfolio careers are becoming increasingly popular and can actually be more lucrative than traditional careers.  All of the individuals that Erin Albert studied for her book “Plan C: The Full-Time Employee and Part-Time Entrepreneur”  were making more money within two years of beginning their portfolio career than they had working a typical nine to five only. (Remember this means they are also working 1.5 jobs as well). Rather than having all of their eggs in one basket, portfolio career-ers have the security of having other skills and jobs to rely on if one job fails or industry crashes. A lay-off is not quite as bad since they have a second or third income source that remains intact. Having a portfolio career also expands and diversifies their professional networks, making it much easier to land another job if necessary. Of course maintaining a portfolio career does not seem to be a cake walk either. I imagine it would take a lot of self-motivation, ingenuity and time management. It also requires both confidence that when one gig ends another one can be found, and the foresight to save enough money to sustain any gaps between jobs. This career path is not for everyone, but for a person with multiple passions, who craves variety and has the organizational skills, courage and motivation – it could be a great option. I am certainly not prepared to jump ship from my current job anytime soon, but will explore some of the other interests that I have, and see where life takes me. For now, just the thought of having other options, and not having to apologize for my inability to commit to one job for the rest of my life, is a relief.  Having a portfolio career would not make me any less successful, goal oriented, or financially secure; and perhaps it would be just what I need to stay engaged, motivated and fulfilled for the remainder of my working life. I am not one dimensional; why does my career need to...

Hallween

By on Oct 31, 2013 in Posts | 0 comments

My win today is that it’s Halloween! Like most holidays, it seems to put people in a good mood. Whether you celebrate by taking photos of your pets or kids in adorable costumes, dressing up yourself, carving pumpkins, watching scary movies, or simply enjoying an extra piece of candy, Halloween is a good time!  Here are my favorite parts of Halloween: Costumes: I am always impressed at the creativity and talent that people display in their costumes. Homemade innovative ones always take the cake in my book. I also like the fact that being in costume often brings out a fun, playful and bold side to otherwise reserved people. When else do you see girls dressed as ninja turtles and guys dressed as care bears! Home: I currently living in California, but was born and raised just outside of Salem, Massachusetts. Because of this, I frequently get questions about Salem around Halloween. It’s fun to talk about where I am from, and share the  history and “ghost stories” associated with it. Rebecca Nurse House pictured below is one such less known place. Parties: It’s a great opportunity to celebrate and socialize (without having to bring a gift or wear high heels). Hint: Dressing as a “baby” makes wearing comfy pajamas out of the house totally socially acceptable! Funny photos: I can literally spend hours looking at photos of Halloween. Each year I think about all of the fun times I’ve had on Halloweens and reminisce about the great, and not so great, costumes I have worn. Being too cheap to buy costumes and not crafty enough to make a really good one, I have worn some memorable (and often unrecognizable) get-ups! One of them is this peanut butter and jelly costume. (Yes that is a purple outfit with a pillow-like backpack I made hoping it would look like a slice of bread and my husband in the coordinating brown outfit and pillow like slice of peanut butter).   Trick-or-Treaters: Handing out candy is few hours of nearly free entertainment. Each time the door-bell rings you can’t help but smile at the cute and funny kids all dressed up. Babies and dogs in costumes are also hilarious and much appreciated this time of year. Haunted houses: I used to be petrified of them (see the above Salem comment- I entered some very scary haunted houses at a young age), but now think they make a great date night, or just fun night out with friends. There’s nothing like a friendly scare to get your adrenaline pumping and make you feel alive! Word to the wise: the people playing the monsters love to attack the person who gives the biggest reaction, so screaming makes you a prime target. Candy corn: I have a theory that people either love candy corn or can’t stand it – very few people are so-so on it. I am one of the candy corn lovers, making this seasonal treat another great part of Halloween! Low-Stress Workday: Many companies allow people to dress up for Halloween. It’s hard to take yourself or your co-workers seriously when dressed in a ridiculous way – making the general vibe of the office lower-stress and higher-fun. How refreshing! Pumpkins: Like with the costumes, pumpkins give people a great opportunity to display their creativity. I am not a great carver, but am happy to season and bake the pumpkin seeds…and how cute are the little pumpkins! Sweets: It’s a great excuse to bake and to eat sweets without the...

Winning the puppy lottery

By on Oct 24, 2013 in Posts | 0 comments

I am not sure what good deed I did in another life to somehow end up with such a well-behaved and loving puppy! I honestly feel like I won the puppy lottery! Norey is friendly, doesn’t bark excessively, doesn’t chew up clothing or furniture, is housebroken and comes when called about 90% of the time.  All of this, despite my husband and I being her third owners in the short 6 months she’s been alive. When she was just a few weeks old, Norey wandered into her previous owner, Rachel’s yard. She was underweight and had a broken tail. Rachel nursed her to health and plastered the neighborhood with lost dog signs, but no one ever came to claim her. Rachel trained Norey well and loved her, but being a recent college grad without a full time job, couldn’t afford to keep her. After having her for a few months she selflessly put an ad on Craigslist with the hope of finding a nice permanent home for Norey. About 5 minutes later, my husband responded to the ad and set up a time to go meet her. Within moments of meeting her, we knew that she was the right dog for us. My husband has wanted a dog (or better yet two) for the past several years. I, on the other hand, wanted to wait until the timing was right. When he first started talking about getting a dog, we lived in a condo complex that did not allow dogs. Despite my husband suggesting that we simply ignore the rule, or certify the dog as a service dog in order to negate the rule, I said no. His wanting a dog, and my hesitancy with getting one before the timing was right became a joke among our family. His aunt even purchased dog supplies for him as a Christmas gift last year, with the hope that I would give in…but I stood my ground. In addition to the “no dog” rule, our condo was on the third story and had only a very small balcony of outdoor space. I thought it was mean to raise a dog without any place to run around (and had nightmares of running down three flights of stairs with a dog in order to avoid accidents while trying to house-train it).  My husband ultimately agreed that it would be in our future dog’s best interest to have a yard. Since we purchased a house with a yard a few months ago, the pressure has been strong. My husband was ready, but I wanted to settle in and finish some of our renovation projects before taking the leap into puppy parenthood. As most of the major projects came to a close, I cited our upcoming vacation as a reason to hold off. Once the yard was in place, major renovations done, and vacation over, I decided I was as ready as I’d ever be, and agreed to begin looking. In our many prior conversations about dogs, my husband and I had agreed that we wanted a medium sized dog, we’d prefer to rescue it and we’d love it to be at least part corgi. Little did I know, my husband had alerts set on his phone for corgi puppies months prior, and had yet to see any rescues that fit the criteria. Once I found out about this, the 5 minute response time to Rachel’s ad, giving away a corgi dachshund puppy, made sense. We couldn’t have planned it better if we’d tried. She is the perfect dog for us, and has quickly quelled all of the hesitation that I’d had about getting a puppy. I worried that a puppy would ruin the hard work we’d put into our home and garden, take away the freedom that we’d had to travel or annoy our neighbors by constantly barking when left alone. Thus far, she’s done none of this (knock on wood she doesn’t suddenly pick up these bad habits). Sometimes life hands you a pleasant surprise and makes you realize that all of your worrying has been unwarranted; this was one of those times.  My win is being proven wrong by my new four legged friend.    ...